“Each patient carries his own doctor inside him.”
― Norman Cousins, Anatomy of an Illness

Welcome back to the doctor-patient communication blog post series. In Part 1, we talked about two important strategies to get your doctor to listen to you. We’ll continue that list now with two more tactics to use to be sure you are getting the best healthcare possible.

1. Trust Your Gut; Be Persistent

To me, this is what the above quote is referencing. If you think there is something wrong, then there is a good chance there is. No one knows your body better than you do. If you used the strategies described in Part 1 but still feel like your doctor did not really listen to your concerns, then here are a couple options:

Request a second opinion

There is no harm in this, don’t worry about offending the doctor. You are your #1 advocate and making sure your health-related worries are seen to is your responsibility as a patient.

Make additional appointments with your own doctor

The squeaky wheel gets the grease, right? If you continue to have symptoms that bother you, keep communicating that to your doctor. This is especially true if you followed the doctor’s orders and little has changed. Don’t give up, be persistent.

2. Be Respectful

When it comes down to it, doctors have it pretty rough. Medicine is often a thankless job that leads to burnout and emotional fatigue. Did you know that the average doctor sees between 11-30 patients per day? And about 2,367 people per year?

One way to ensure that they pay closer attention to you than others is to be as respectful as possible, even when you do not feel like you are being heard. Remember, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar (I’m apparently chock full of old expressions today).

It seems so basic, but remember to say “thank you” and tell them you appreciate their help. You may even go so far as to send them a thank you note afterward. And be aware of your negative nonverbal communication (ex. facial expressions, eye rolls, crossing your arms) that could indicate you are dissatisfied, and attempt to avoid doing them. All of these things will get them to appreciate you too, which in the long run will make them want to spend more time with you and help you feel better.

Being respectful also means acknowledging that they actually do have a credential in medicine and you do not. As I mentioned above, I don’t believe this means that they know you better than you know yourself; however, they are experts in Western medicine, which is primarily focused on using a process of elimination to diagnose an illness.

In other words, they have gone through years of schooling, and telling them they are wrong and the internet is right is probably a bit offensive. But this also doesn’t mean that the internet doesn’t have valid information. What works for me is saying something like this:

“So I was on Dr. Google and read about (xyz). Is that something you think might be a possibility?”

This almost always gets a laugh out of my doctors, so it keeps the conversation light. It also allows me to acknowledge that I know that just because I read it online does not mean it’s true. And the follow up question suggests that I am still deferring to them for their expert opinion on the matter.

For example, with my hip pain discussed in Part 1, I mentioned to my doctor that Dr. Google had told me it could possibly be bursitis. Then I went on to ask him if this is something they were considering. He told me that it was a possibility, and that the procedure (i.e. a steroid hip injection) would help them rule that out. If I hadn’t asked, he would have never mentioned bursitis and I would have been left in the dark; however, because I wasn’t abrasive about my own research he was able to have a conversation with me without feeling like I had already diagnosed myself.

Summary

Be your own healthcare advocate. In fact, do so loudly (but politely) if necessary. Any way you can create a relationship with your doctor is a great way to get them to care about you more than the thousands of other patients they see annually.

Stay tuned for Part 3 and more easy to implement tips on how to get your doctor to listen to you.

And be sure to share this article with others so that they too can improve their healthcare communication skills!